July 18, 2013. Thursday. 9 P.M. This is
really bad! I am overwhelmed with study demands which makes me somehow enjoy
denying it by… doing other things unrelated to them. I’ve been watching one of
my favorite anime series in which I am hoping will stimulate my motivation
unconsciously while having diversion. I have swimming schedules with Ms. Anne
every Sunday, staying in her place for the night. I am rather focused on
learning to swim than studying for my MBA. Starting this week I planned to do
it 3 times but failed ‘coz I felt lazy doing anything. Idle time doesn’t seem
to bother me now than it often does. I want to put down everything and sit and think
and rethink, repetitively.
There has been changes at work which
contributed to how I am feeling. The first half of the month is very toxic and
I find the second half… very lame, a total opposite. I am glad I met Steve,
giving my morning somewhat a spice, rather than random song playlists or movies
through my earphones. Joggling work and him at the same time is fine with me but
my work and school have to be one after the other because they are both too
mind-filling. I did try joggling them together for a while and the result was less
work efficiency. I have listed all my requirements for this term and I am
hoping to address them precisely without exhausting myself. As much as I want
to escape, I can’t. It is simply because… escaping just won’t help… but
meditating will. Alright Daisy, relax your jaw!!!
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