Man

Alright, this one is super corny. Sometimes a mood hits us, right? So I wrote this during my corny day which was yesterday and I still feel a little of that now so I am sharing this. Don't get sick with this cheekiness though coz it is way better than being violent and mean hahaha :-P

Man

I close my eyes as I fall into the arms of my man.

His hands on mine feel rough yet gentle and warm.

The way he pulls me close affirms we are meant to be.

And my heart rejoices everytime he is with me.

An affectionate look he has for me colors my day.

He is happy to have me loving him in ways I know.

His eyes dancing looking at me tickles my soul.

A moment I can’t get enough I always adore.

He kisses me dearly making me feel beautiful and sexy.

He knows how to love me it always surprises me.

For him I only keep falling coz even pain is worthy at the end.

I open my eyes and man, you truly are the man of my dream.

~ Dizzy ~

Slow and Quick

Attitude. Attitude. Attitude.

A few snaps from one of my ballroom dancing practices with dance instructor Ms. Anne. She’s a funny and strong woman, who is teaching me gracefulness through ballroom for free. I always want to do some ballroom and it's great I met someone who shares the same interest as me! Thank you Ms. Anne! More and more practices to go! You are great and hopefully I wont let you down later in our practices when we go in a real dance floor with other instructors.  I have lots to learn but I’m gonna rock the floor! Hopefully giving your effort some justice!:-D

Share

''No man is an island.

And if you wont open up,

You’ll never gonna heal.''

Whenever I am sad, I keep everything to myself. I make sure no one sees me crying. I don’t want to look pathetic to anyone. I don’t need pity either. It’s not because I think vulnerability is a weakness, but because I am the one who put myself in the situation in the first place. Sometimes I feel stupid with the result of my decision but with all of my best I answer to the consequences. I seek help with myself first before others coz I cant expect anyone to cover me and be there for me at all times. It may seem I am stubborn in a way but they have their own life to think about and it is selfish to steal their time for me if there is something I can do anyway.

On the otherhand, when it is too much it is best to share. Like in films, we need supporting actresses or actors. We always know our limit, we may admit it or not, so learn to share. I always listen to those who need ears but for myself I prefer to be read than to be heared. Maybe coz when I cry I cant talk much, I only murmur. So here, I write to express myself further. A place I find comfort then I feel better.

Remember to share coz u are not only helping yourself but also others. How? They learn from your experiences in many ways.

Everyone needs a supporting system and you blogger, you are part of mine! =)

Two Way Beauty

Appreciating beauty in both ways!!! ^__^

The dried up rose has lived on my desk for 6 months or so.
And looks like it will stay there a lot longer.
The fresh one I got today is lovely.
And I both love them!

''There is Yin - Yang in everything.
They are complementary forces.
Interconnected and intependent to one another.
One cannot be understood without the other.''

~ Dizzy ~

Ashes to ashes

Lastnight, I was at the funeral home and death is surely constant. As constant as change. A change for everyone at any time and place, in various ways. No one is exempted including myself, to leave this physical world permanently. The time shared will be treasured. A heart that has touched others will be missed. A life lived with principles will be rememembered. And when my time comes, I hope to leave happily.

There is a belief saying not to come home straight or at least pass over some ashes (of woods, ciggies, etc) after going to a wake. Well, I did not come home as I havent been home much lately but I still comply with it before coming in to a friend's house. So what we did was we bought a mini pack of some cheap ciggarette and lit each sticks, then we had ashes!!! It was funny trying to smoke those sticks really fast (as in really really fast!) 'til we had enough. I just can't forget! Then, we placed them by the main doorstep and stamped our feet on them a few times before stepping inside the house.

From ashes to ashes, aren't we?

Worlds

From desk and house to cyberspace and coutless somewhere else.
My ground is extending my homebase I have to retain.
Two different worlds holding treasures of dust and gold.
My manners of discovery are lessons with unmeasurable worth.

Sometimes it is tiring to manage everything I feel like running.
But running away is a sick game no one can ever win.
Pause and rest then get on with full determination and trust with oneself.
`Coz in between these worlds, there is always something one can live for.

~ Dizzy ~

Maybe

Maybe I am soft and sometimes weak,
But I am strong I can always rely on.
Maybe I cry and sometimes break down,
But I can get back up helping my own.

Maybe I am cautious and sometimes careless.
But I weigh and calculate risks.
Maybe I am right and sometimes wrong,
But I take full responsibility of my action.

Maybe I am patient and sometimes hasty.
But I keep my eyes on the prize.
Maybe I am helpful and sometimes bothersome.
But I am sincere when I sympathize.

Maybe I am sensitive and sometimes I misread,
But I can understand anyone as much as I can.
Maybe I am serious and sometimes silly,
But I learn and I am just being me.

Maybe I am sweet and sometimes I sugarcoat,
But I can be as sour as pure lemon juice.
Maybe I am nice and too good to be true,
But I can be evil when I need to.

Maybe I dont beg and sometimes I dont ask.
But I know I dont want to be denied.
Maybe I try too hard and sometimes I dont fight.
But I know if I do I wont give up.


~ Dizzy ~

Love My Love

Love me when the fire is glowing or when it is dull.
Love me when the water is clean or when it is cloudy.
Love me when the air is pure or when it is dry.
Love me when the earth is balanced or when it is falling apart.

Love me when it is hot or when it is cold.
Love me when it is bright or when it is dark.
Love me when it is all good or when it is all bad.
Love me when it is easy or when it is hard.

Love my love and let it grow to its best.
Nourish my love, standing bold and proud.
My love that never wither all through your life.
I will be alive, only for you my love.

~ Dizzy ~

I'll Manage

Last Friday, I attended a business management lecture for free. There were about 30 people including myself who were there. The best part was sharing experiences managing their own businesses. Apart from knowledge and skills needed, instincts and guts are important keys for success. I consider myself gifted with good instincts and guts, but I need to gain more knowledge and skills. Learning is really fun, by the way.

Life is like a business. Sometimes you don’t do things by contract. We break the rules by being kind and considerate when needed but not to the point of compromising much the other side. Take a calculated risk! Businesses live coz of people and people need them. It is give and take. But every person is different and not everyone thinks the way you do. When a person is not human to deal with, you take out the rules and follow it. You stand your ground and not let them walk over or overpower you, otherwise you lost yourself and your business dies. At all times, success is all about you. How you handle yourself when it’s great and when it’s complicated. Knowing when to let things go is also important to keep yourself sound and focused for the bigger view. Keep a positive attitude, in business and in life.

There, I met these two humble people who have the same views as me and they both own a business. One in his mid 40’s, is selling toys. At some points, he did export and import products. Now, he designs some of them. It is always about passion, I told him. He nodded, saying‘’keeping it interesting in the market.’’ Second, in his early 30’s, is managing his own travel agency and recently branched out. He was in food industry before but landed holding an agency. Life was easy on him, he said. He got married, migrated to Canada and lived almost perfectly. Then one day he said to his wife, ‘’life here is too good. It’s boring. Let’s go back home and do business.’’ They came home, doing business together and later surprised they are branching out. I realized - when it’s too good, its boring, then do something!

I don’t know what is with me, but these two were the ones who smiled and approached me first, making conversations. I am lucky they are not the annoying type and I learned something from them! There is something that keeps them interested with me and I was bothered somehow, coz it seems I am getting that kind of attention a lot. I remember someone told me, I look harmless and I smile a lot. Harmless. That is something I recall whenever I start to wonder. I don’t know if that is a good trait. Or something right for someone to be in business. Or that could be a weakness! Whatever that is, I’ll just shut the annoying ones, which is easy anyway. Ha ha ha Hopefully I’ll manage.

My Blogger is Me

~ Dizzy ~

Places to see. People to meet.
Events to attend. Works to finish.
Hangouts to enjoy. Sleepovers to come.
Talks to do. And laughs too.

They keep me busy. They are easy for me.
But I lost their sense. They are temporary.
At the end of the day, blogspot is where I want to be.
To get busy with something very special to me.

My mirror. It shows all sides of me.
And colors of diffent hue. Even when its blue.
Youre not that good but trying. I'll keep you.
My blogger. You are me and I am you.

Flash A Smile

When you feel like screaming,

be still,

hold a deep breath,

And release in a count of five.

Repeat for 5 times.

Then SMILE.

Let it go and make it natural.

Try it!

~ Dizzy ~

Or flash this smile to whoever is near you,
then laugh anyway. Ha ha ha
Maybe silly and stupid,
But sometimes it is all we need.

Smile

I watch you quietly from a distance
Tapping your fingers and singing inside you i bet.
I wonder whats on your mind
But im enjoying the view im seeing.

You turn urself to where i stand and catch me
U smile sweetly and i cant help but smile just the same
Hoping you get my message
To see you smile is a perfect moment

I want to make you smile
All I want is to make you smile
I will make you smile
Çoz you make my heart smile.

~ Dizzy ~

Balance Sheet of Life

I found this about two years ago and have kept it. I finished an accounting course and I am working in accounting too. I thoughthis one is really good to have.
To everyone, regardless you do accounting or not, you would probably like this too, so here i am sharing this so-called Balance Sheet of Life. ~ Dizzy ~


The happiness of life is made of little things - a smile, a hug,a moment of shared laughter - its not the wealth you amass but what you give to others & the lives you touch that you take with you for eternity!

Our Birth is our Opening Balance!

Our Death is our Closing Balance!

Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities

Our Creative Ideas are our Assets

Heart is our Current Asset

Soul is our Fixed Asset

Brain is our Fixed Deposit

Thinking is our Current Account

Achievements are our Capital

Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade

Friends are our General Reserves

Values & Behaviour are our Goodwill

Patience is our Interest Earned

Love is our Dividend

Children are our Bonus Issues

Education is Brands / Patents

Knowledge is our Investment

Experience is our Premium Account

The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.

Together

Run, play and laugh together.
Be silly and have fun together.
Be a friend and proud of each other.
Wish, dream and plan together.
Walk, stay and relax together.
Hug and cuddle each other.

Argue, forgive and listen each other.
Respect, support, advise each other.
Be frank and honest to each other.
Fight, solve and learn together.
Be kind and patient to each other.
Take care of one another.

Be passionate and a joy to each other.
Hold and treasure each other.
Think and talk about each other.
Trust and defend each other.
Smile and do as you love each other.
To tango together that last forever!


~ Dizzy ~

LIFE

Life is a diary, fill it.
Life is a road, take it.
Life is a challenge, accept it.
Life is a mystery, unfold it.
Life is a puzzle, solve it.
Life is a question, answer it.

Life is a gift, accept it.
Life is a journey, cover it.
Life is an adventure, experience it.
Life is a sea of sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a struggle and fight, face it.
Life is a game, play it.

Life is a beauty, praise it.
Life is full of happiness, enjoy it.
Life is an ice cream, love it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a wish, get it.
Life is precious, save it.

Life is an opportunity, take it.
Life is a goal, achieve it.
Life is a mission, fulfill it.
Life is a book, read it.
Life is life, live it.

This has been always on my desk in years. I had it printed and laminated.
And every now and them, I read it. Today, I just thought why not share it here too.
So, there you go =)

Paradise

Lying down on the white fine sand
on the shore of a blue green sea
with blowing breeze dancing gracefully
like your arms wrapping me.

I open my eyes i see clear blue sky
So close my hands through clouds
Looking down it's a wonderland
Im in cloud nine when you're around.

Gliding with the wind down touching the ground
As i smile humming with the tune of my heart
flowers bloom swaying and dancing happily
Simply in a paradise when your eyes on mine.

~ Dizzy ~

.

Be kind to yourself

Worry is a total waste of time.
It doesn't change anything.
All it does is steal your joy,
and keep you very busy doing nothing.
Now turn your thoughts around.
'Coz you're only attracting negative energies.
Be positive and be happy.
Be kind to yourself too.

~ Dizzy ~

Good View

''One of the keys to happiness is bad memory.''

A joke? Yes, with a truth. It is an ability that comes in handy. I don't have that and I'm not sad. Oh please, I cant have Alzheimer! Those gifted with better memory, don't worry. Memories can be managed.

Sometimes when things go wrong, I thought to just disappear. To get lost away from everything and everyone. So maybe through that, I'll stop looking back. But that's just not me. Still, I'd look back, for a good view!!!

Nice viewing blogger and goodnight! =)

Senseless

A man without a face.

With name unknown.

No traces of the past.

In the night sky formed.

Fingertips touched.

Curling up slowly.

Fancy in the air.

Turning powder.

Spoke in whisper.

A shout from a far.

Words echoing.

To a hollow end.

~ Dizzy ~

Switch it ON

Where is the switch?
It is within yourself.
YOU are the reason of your happiness.
And no one else!
Switch it on and keep it on.
Without it in your darkest time,
Even your shadow leaves you.
So always remember to switch it on!

~ Dizzy ~

Love In The Rain

A cup of hot perfect coffee for my taste.

Oh my favorite raisin bread I droll to taste.

A pouring rain always a wonderful music I want to hear.

And I, sitting comfortably on my chair.

There is always love in the rain.

It washes impurities and refreshes everything.

It is gentle or rough, our love to nature surprises us.

However it is, my admiration is fixed and wont change.

I walk slowly when it comes and gives me chills in my spine.

I get wet but it's great and sometimes dirty but it's fun.

It's melody caresses my ear canal, a perfect way to my heart.

And each touch on my skin is a smack or smooch on my lips.

Lightning makes my heart beat fast.

Thunder screams my feelings out.

Silver liquid drops are wonders in my eyes.

A package from heaven's above. 

It's an offer worth taking and beat worth dancing with.

Take the moment and make it count til rays comes out.

A rainbow welcomes you and birds chirping to say hello.

Hello, hello, hello, are you having fun too?

~ Dizzy ~

Be Proud

Indeed!

I thought I betrayed myself from my previous post. I was not sure if I was being rude? Really? I did message him? Yeah, that was quite a betrayal to my own self. Seriously though, my face was red from getting too upset - about anything. I did not expect him to reply at all, yet he did. It was fun a bit, but fun from breaking words is short time. And I knew in my heart, it could possibly be the last talk we could have, so I had to end fooling around with myself. What for? I knew he prefers us not talking. In fact, in the morning I messaged him to confirm and guess what? I got no reply! Ha ha ha See what I meant? Well I'd respect that and I respect myself more.

Sometimes my pains hunt me. It keeps visiting me every now and then. I hate it but there is always something I can do. Can't hide my feelings and can't lie to myself. All that is normal. So I savor the view to each and every angle of the whole picture and just listen and listen and listen to myself, particularly my mind.

I feel better. Earphones screwed deep in my ears banging music in my ear drums, I no longer require, to overpower the roaring of my heart and stirring my thoughts to every direction, all causing me confusion. Perfectly faking smile, pretending to have a light-weighted heart and struggling to control emotion are all that I dont need to try.

There is nothing much I can say other than, ''I am truly proud of myself, I always am!''.

Be proud of yourself blogger! =)

Shake It Out

Tonight I sort of try to reconnect to online people through chat rooms, to see if I have managed myself. It is frustrating there to ever find a sound and sane person i know, but I tried anyway. Well then, I came across to this man almost twice my age who was not that bad. I was able to talk to him about anything and just say any good and bad remarks. I think though I was a bit like a mean bitch when I got irritated as we talked.

The thing is I restraint myself from speaking when im annoyed and upset so I never get to express much how I feel like maybe in a proper way, otherwise I'm just silent. So to cut the story short, this man I practiced myself to, was trying to have fun a little in between the conversation but I just got easily upset and became too serious I'd say. So he told me, I am rude a few times and I have a bighead, that he can't waste more of his time talking to me coz he has had enough of my rudeness. I thought that was funny coz that was sort of my aim to make him upset in a way. But hey, someone has turned back on me!

I felt insulted and really upset to this man though I know I caused it. For a second, it made me think, maybe I was rude, or maybe I have grown rude, but I would barely talk when im annoyed. But anyway I was so upset, so to confirm, quickly I messaged my ex and asked him if im rude. He replied saying he doesnt think im rude. As soon as I saw he replied, my tears just started running down my cheeks. The thought that he cared to reply made me cry. I hate is when I am at the rage of my emotion and someone cares to be there or listens to me - makes me cry my eyes out.

Thats the reason why I havent told Remy about my break up coz I know she cares how I feel so much that it will break my heart to see her having to look after the broken me. ''Sistah, when you get to read this, I'm sorry that I denied you of the chance to show how much you care for me and the moment you read this, I am already better. I just want to pull this shit out myself as much as I can, alone, without troubling you. I know you are always there. You are always this very caring soul to anyone you love and that includes me and I thank you.''

Lately, I have not been feeling too well. I'm too emotional and very sensitive towards everything, as I can observe myself. Even when Im laughing at something funny, I get teary and tears start falling. It is like I have an overflowing reservoir behind my eye balls.

Oh blogger, you are quite a help to shake out my thoughts!

Shake it out, yeah!

Good Night Blogger =)

Life-Long Dream

~ Dizzy ~

My emotion fluctuates and I am very upset.
I want to scream so loud and empty my lungs.
I want to beat someone, perhaps to death.
Or smash anything my eyes can see.

I am upset at everything right now.
I hate him but I hate more myself.
I had all the choices right in my hands.
And I let things come to this is just one.

He was so special and dear to me and still is.
I still love him but I have reached the edge.
An edge he wont even try go and hold my hand.
He is not that kind of man I can really rely myself upon.

I want to march right to him.and look him straight right in his eyes.
Tell him ''You are an unreliable son of a bitch!
Even your love alone I cant be proud of.
I dont like you anymore. I'm tired loving you.''

At times, out of the blue I want to tell him that.
But then I stop myself and say, ''he doesn't care so why bother''.
Yes I am upset, but I wont lost myself over things I dont have.
Or run around like Dennis Rodman and headbutt anyone.

He could be first in my hitlist, my target to be shot in the head.
''You hurt me, I'll bring you down'', but that wont pleasure me.
''Too quick is not fun unlike taking your parts one by one.
Well, I'll spare your life coz Im too worn out to move my gun..''

To say even a word to him I no longer think he deserves.
Why whine if again, for nothing and another turning of back.
Im not coward, Im just sick and tired.
Im not a saint, not either superwoman.

Really, everything was like a life-long dream.
Like Sleeping Beauty, who slept a hundred years.
The only thing is, she woke up and met her prince.
And me, I woke up and lost him.

An Inside Job

If we are happy and see someone happy it enlightened our mood making us happier. If we are sad and see someone laughing, its either u think and say, ''good for them they are happy and pity for me im not'', or ''they are happy and i should be too''. I believe happiness is a choice. Yes, the atmosphere you are in affects you but if your inner you is deeply sad, no matter where u are, in a great party or in a group of great people, you will remain in you emotional state if you wont pull from within to choose to be happy. Even if you are at home with your family or with your best of friends, you are only safe and calm but how you will feel is still up to you. No one can ever change how you feel other than yourself. You have to make a choice coz happiness is an inside job. You make it happen. It always has to start from yourself.

''Let your smile change the world and never let the world change your smile.''

Happy days bloggers! =)

Everything Alright

''Always do what is right, to make everything alright.'', said the married man who gave a message to the newly wed couple.
He said it as a reminder to each of them and he spoke from the heart and from experiences.
And I would say, a commitment is a kind of bond you dont break and you keep thru thick and thin in any form of relationships -  husband-wife, boy-girl, friendship, best of friends, brothers, sisters, father-son, mother-daughter, and so on. It is your home that you love, defend, repair, develop, and look for when you are lost. And yes indeed, you would always do everything and what is right to make it alright.
To both of you, King and Beth together with your wonderful daughter and kids to come, my best wishes for you. In calm and rough seas, you keep sailing together. Cheers!