It is Monday and my mind is a mess.
Eyes weigh heavy and numb from not crying.
Grieving from the loss a couple of days ago,
I wish we'd talk like we usually do.
Time difference of 7 did not matter.
Now, it does as it becomes a health hazard.
With stresses from work, responsibilities, finances, distance, etc.
It is totally an Urgh!!!
Alright, he needed some time, hell lots of time.
And it seems he realized I am a stress,
Then I am meant to be eliminated.
It is funny - I like the compliment.
To occupy myself, I need to write,
Specially in this used-to-be-occupied-time-with-him.
Soon this site will be full of thoughts,
Which I hope to be in peace and not mess.
I do not hope somebody gets to read these,
But someday I might spread the thoughts.
Or could be really soon,
To get an opinion.
I wonder if anyone gets interested, though,
Or thinks these are hilarious.
Whatever it will be,
What matter is I got thru the day.
To my closest friend, Desiry,
Who only hears my deepest troubles.
Thanks for bearing with me.
I'l give u this page in the following days.
I will keep on writing, composing phrases to paragraphs
For every post I finish I accomplish.
As composing a post is composing myself.
And see one day if I have truly made it.
Oh God Almighty, please help, I beg.
I do feel sooo helpless.
Please be my cushions,
'coz when I try push up, I'd fall right back.
I know I have to help myself.
Keep on pushing up no matter what.
I just took my morning off from work,
So I better make a move and get ready to work.
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