August 3,
2013. Saturday. 11:55 P.M. These weekdays I left work at 10, 10, 8, 12, 5:30 at
night from Monday to Friday, due to earlier deadlines starting this month, termination
of the old accounting and payroll system last July 31, and the verification of
the new one for its live trial process. When it rains, it pours! The last time
I studied my ass off was last Sunday so when I left on time from work
yesterday, I went for a meditation, came home, took a nap, reviewed briefly for
an hour about what I previously studied and went to sleep at 10:30 P.M. My
midterm exam was today and I never study the night before or during the exam
day. No matter how I would try, it is completely useless- it will only stress
me. I prefer to relax my brain and sleep as much as I can possibly could. ‘Coz
the last thing I would want to lose is my sanity! Minutes before the exam, I
was throwing analytical questions to helpful classmates as a form of brief
review to polish not only my thoughts towards possible questions but theirs
too. Then, what I was asking about came out in the exam, so… , it truly was a
win-win exercise. They even thanked me for asking, it saved them time polishing
their answer before writing. My exam went good I could say, although I know I
could have given more. But with the level of pressure and number of demands for
this week, I feel truly blessed I did not screw up anything. They are nothing
compared with the sense of self accomplishment and the contributions I had
shared with others, at work and school.
After the
exam, I stayed in the graduates’ library with my research group for our papers
‘til 5:30 P.M. then went out with my 3 good friends from school, Hershey,
Jhoana, and Elmae (not enrolled for this trimester). I had a really good time with
them, just having a simple dinner together which lasted for about 3 hours from
various chitchat topics. It’s good to be around with your complements, it’s
like being able to get ‘’more rest’’ just when you need it.
Last Friday,
Remy told me to go home and get some rest coz she knew it has been just work
and work for throughout the weekdays for me. I was at the verge to tears then ‘coz
I am such a meltdown to feel sincere concern in the moment of too much
tiredness. I wish everyone is sensitive enough and the world would be a better
place for everybody. One of the IT’s I had been working side by side for the
new program asked me ‘’You can’t be stopped working hard, don’t you?’’. And I
said, ‘’It’s commitment dear. I’m committed to finish this damn thing called verifying
your work or I’ll be damned!!! If I can’t meet the deadline on Monday, it’s
your fault. Hahaha’’ He was like…. ‘’alright, alright!’’ and laughed it away.
I am always
inclined to writing ‘’Stress policy implementation at workplace’’ for my case study,
coz we don’t have it and the management has very least concern with their
employees. Everyone would agree with me, apart of course from those in work
politics, kissing the management’s asses. I’ll probably write one then.
Now that the
midterm exam is over, I have 2 more presentations to do in a week or 2, then
the final exams next month. I’d be restless! Whoah! It’s way too handy compared
to having a boyfriend though. I can afford to sleep a lot than before! hahaha
and speaking of boys, I have to apologize to Steve on Monday when we talk ‘coz
I think I went too sexy wild with him last week and I thought if we lived
close, I would have done the same. It went fine but he’s not just my boyfriend.
It’s very not me. Well I only had 1 boyfriend and he only had my eyes, so I
guess I can’t differentiate scenarios much haha excuses!!! Seriously though, Steve
is someone I could just loose myself to. I only want commitment when it comes
to relationship and I had always been in control and I’m not really a control
freak. It just happened that I had to be the one to stand up and I believed I
have given that a pride and I have no regrets coz I learned a lot. Well, now if
by chance be with someone, I want to be with someone I can afford to be weak
and it seems I find that with Steve. He can somehow balance me out. I don’t
want to scare him away or lost his respect to me, so I am just gonna be professional/friend
with him as much as I can. I’ll see how it goes ‘coz love is in the air! ^__^.
